An Actual Craig's List Personals Ad...

AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD:

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last. Date: 2010-09-27, 1:43 am. E.S.T. I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message. First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket.. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason.. my girlfriend was happy that I just returned safely from my 2nd tour as a Combat Marine in Afghanistan .. She had just bought me that Kimber Custom Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening. Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?! I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with crap in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me. [That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again]. After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 153 gallons and was extremely grateful! I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!] I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ..... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car. Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target. The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.). ;In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only hope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.. Remember, next time you might not be so lucky. Have a good day! Thoughtfully yours, Semper Fi, Alex.

**This made me LOL :D

A Letter from my Hubby...

Dearest wife,
Thank you. Thank you for caring. Thank you for being an awesome mother for our children. Thank you for being strong. Thank you for being my rock. My friend. My partner in life. Thank you for everything you do. Thank you for finding the strength to do what you do. I love you. I love your humor and your wit. Thank you for everything. ♥

Love This...

So True...

If two points are destined to touch ... the universe will always find a way to make the connection ... even when all hope seems lost ... certain ties cannot be broken ... they define who we are ... and who we can become ... across space ... across time ... along paths we cannot predict ... nature always finds a way ♥ ♥ ~

Throughout Life...

Throughout life each of us endures both painful hardships and soaring triumphs. Lessons are inherent in each experience if we will only listen. We grow by remaining fully conscious of the gifts we are given. Our responsibility to ourselves and the world is to seek out knowledge and act on what we learn. We must breathe deeply, trust ourselves, be unashamed, and gather strength from the lessons learned on our individual journeys to become whole.

Always Remember...

No one regrets not working enough hours at the end of their life. What we really regret is not making more time for the people we love. Always remember that.