Thursday, September 21, 2006

Another update on Aiden…

We had our appointment on Monday afternoon up at CHOP (Children’s Hospital of Pennsylvania). We met with the surgeon to talk about everything that has been going on with Aiden. He had asked us about Aiden’s throwing up and we discussed Pyloric Stenosis and testing him for that. He also didn’t feel that is what the problem that Aiden is having is. He is more worried about Aiden not going poop than him throwing up which makes sense I guess. He is leaning towards it being Hirschsprung's Disease and he wants to do a full thick rectal biopsy. It is going to be done same day in the hospital, so he won’t have to stay over night or anything. They are going to have to put him under anesthesia and that scares me. Actually the whole thing does! I felt like an ass because when he told us that is what he wanted to do I wanted to cry. I just can’t imagine what they are going to do to Aiden or how he is going to feel afterwards. People keep telling me not to worry about it, that he won’t remember it and I think that is a load of crap. He may not remember it later but he definitely feels it in the moment. I hate knowing that he is hurting or in pain. We go for the biopsy on Wednesday so hopefully everything will go well and it won’t be Hirschsprung's Disease. I want to know what is the matter with him and make him better but at the same time I don’t want him to have to go through a surgery.

On a happy note, I posted a bunch of new pictures of my lil cutie patootie. Here’s the link if anyone wants to see them :-)

Saturday, September 16, 2006

An update on Aiden...

Aiden is ok, we are still going back and fourth with the doctors and the hospital. Last Friday morning we had an appointment with the pediatrician to check his weight and stuff. The only good thing about the day was that he gained a pound. So we were all happy about that. Then the doctor sent us to the CHOP (children’s hospital of Philadelphia) emergency room for some testing. He wanted them to give him an ultrasound to test him for Pyloric Stenosis. They took Aiden right back and started to check him out. After talking to them about everything that has been going on with him they said it can’t be Pyloric Stenosis because he does not have projectile vomiting. John and I told them about how we have read it doesn’t always start out that way and such and they didn’t want to hear it. We also told them about Jenna’s and Joshua’s story. They still didn’t want to hear it. Poor little Aiden was starving because they wouldn’t let him eat unitl they figured out what kind of tests they were going to run on him for in case he had to be fasting. He was screaming & crying and after 6 hours us constantly asking if we could feed him and them telling us no. We finally insisted we were going to that it was bullshit to make him suffer. They took a couple of x-rays and said everything looked fine and then some bitch shoved her finger up his poor lil ass to check for blood in his poop. She couldn’t get any poop so proceeded to jam her finger up even higher. She wasn’t gentle or caring in the least bit. Aiden started screaming and crying at the top of his lungs. You would have thought that someone was cutting his fingers and toes off one by one. I wasn’t sure who was going to punch the doctor in the face first. Me or John. It was a long day and night and they really did nothing for us. We left with still no answers. We have to go back to CHOP on Monday because they want to do a rectal biopsy on him. They are testing him for Hirschsprung's Disease. I was so hoping that things would get better and we wouldn’t have to go that route, but they haven’t. I’m not sure if they are actually going to do the procedure on Monday or if we are just meeting with the surgeon so that he can check Aiden out and tell us what he thinks.

It just sucks and I wish I could do something for him. I’m desperate at this point. People are probably going to laugh at me and think I’m crazy. On Tuesday night we took Aiden up to Philly to see a psychic/spiritualist/healer so that she could do a healing on him. She was really awesome and seemed to know what she was talking about. She really calmed Aiden down a lot and he fell asleep in John’s arms while she was doing the healing. Every time she touched Aiden he would smile and let out this happy little sigh kind of noise. He hasn’t been going poop aside from when we give him meds to go but he has been sleeping better, he’s been more happy, and will actually sit by himself in his bouncy chair or crib for a little bit. Before he wouldn’t. She also suggested some homeopathic things to try so we are also doing that. Like I said, at this point I’m desperate and will try anything to make my lil man feel better. I hate that he’s in pain and it breaks my heart when he cries uncontrollably. So that’s about it on what’s going on with him. Hopefully we will find something out on Monday and he will be ok. You know? Anyway, I have to finish pumping and get ready to go. We have a wedding to go to this afternoon. I would just rather stay home all by myself with my lil boy. I absolutely love our time together and I’m going to miss it so much next week when I go back to work. I get to take him with me so that’s a good thing but it won’t be the same. We won’t have the same quality time to just hang out cuddle together.

Sunday, September 03, 2006

One month old...

I can’t believe that Aiden is already a month old!!! Time is going by so quickly. He’s been having problems with his belly and that makes me sad. I hate suckass doctors that can’t figure out what is going on and making him feel yucky. He’s getting big and developing such an awesome little personality. I love him more than anything in this world and just want him to be ok. Aiden and I hang out all the time and I love spending time with him. It can be stressful at times but it is so worth it. He’s my sunshine. John is of course back to work now and misses our days together but he makes up for it when he gets home and on the days he has off. I think Aiden is turning into a lil momma’s boy. That’s not a bad thing though :-) He makes the most awesome expressions and faces. Every morning I lay him down on my bed in between my legs and he just kicks and stretches all over the place. I call it his morning workout. He goos & gahs and smiles, I love it. He holds his head up all the time and tries to roll onto his side. He gets mad when he can’t do it. He’s such a strong little man. He's getting so strong. He loves to grab onto your fingers with his hands and he has such a strong grip. He also loves to grab onto a huge clump pf my hair and not let go. Haha. Aiden also loves listening to music, when I sing to him, when John reads to him, and he loves looking at pictures. He is responding to peoples voices when they walk into a room and he recognizes them. More so mine and John’s voice. It’s just so awesome and he’s truly amazing. Oh, and he has the most beautiful smile and everytime he smiles at me it makes my heart melt!

Happy one month old Birthday my lil panda bear. Daddy and I love you lots and lots!!!!

xoxo

Friday, September 01, 2006

Sorry for the lack of updates...

Sorry for the lack of updates and not writing Aiden’s birth story yet. Things have been so crazy. Doing all of my mommy things & spending time with Aiden takes up all of my time. He’s been having problems with his belly and has not been feeling well or very happy. We’ve already had two pediatricians (the first one sucked ass!!), have also been to a specialist, and then to the hospital twice for them to do tests. All we can do to make him happy and comfortable seems to be by holding him and sometimes that doesn’t even work. It kills me when he cries his heart out and I can’t make him feel better. I totally feel like I suck as a mom & he hates me because I can't make him feel better or make him happy. John says I'm insane for thinking it. I just don't know what to do to make him feel better and I feel so helpless. I don’t get much done until John gets home from work and we can take turns passing him back and fourth. We are still waiting to get all of the test results back and to see the doctor again. I just feel so tired and overwhelmed right now. I love my lil guy more than anything in this world. I just wish I could make him feel better and take away his pain.