More Rambling of Sorts...

It just seems like there is so much to do and I feel like I'm on such a time limit here it drives me crazy! John was really sick most of last week and the weekend so we really didn't get much accomplished. I thought he might have eaten bad sushi but it just turns out he has the same cold/flu thing going around that everyone else has. Last night we went to Target to buy some totes and stuff so I can start packing stuff away to put into storage. I can't believe how much crap I have. Seriously, it is insane! Anyway, when we were in Target I had to make myself walk away from the baby stuff. I love just sitting there looking at everything. I was like Traci just walk away and John just laughed at me. I guess once we find out if it is a girl or boy that I will be able to buy stuff but until then I really try not to tempt myself. We sent our parents and my grandmom copies of the ultrasound picture from the 15th so that they could see what the lil munchkin looks like. My grandmom called my mom last night to tell her she got it. She said that she couldn't see the baby but it's a girl. Haha, how I hope she is right. No really, I really want a girl and always have. I have my names and everything for her all picked out but to be honest I really think it is a boy. I don't know why, it is just a gut feeling that I have. John honestly doesn't care, he just wants it to be a healthy baby. I guess he is right. We've been racking our brains trying to think of boys names for just in case and we really haven't come up with anything good. On Saturday we were just laying around and watching movies relaxing and I got up to go to the bathroom and when I was on my way back to bed I got horrible horrible cramps or pains or something in my lower stomach area. I don't know what it was or how to describe it but it seriously hurt. I was trying to walk out of the bathroom hunched over and was like John there's something the matter, it hurts so bad. He had to help me get back into bed (I have a really high bed). It hurt on and off for the rest of the night but then it seemed to pass the next day. I had some really bad nights of sleep over the weekend so I gave in and took a Tylenol PM. It really helped me and I was happy for that. On Saturday and Sunday I had an upset stomach and was scared that I was coming down with whatever John has. Thank goodness it passed and I feel better now. Last night when I was cleaning and packing I was getting horrible pains in my lower back and my sciatic nerve or something. So I had to just get the stuff and sit on my bed and put it away. I'm a blockhead when it comes to that stuff and I want to do everything myself and don't want people doing things for me. I know I have to stop this because I can't be lifting heavy stuff but it's just hard for me. Other than that I can't think of anything else going on. I go to the doctors on Thursday to see if they can remove this lumpy thing off my belly button. I seriously hope they can because it is getting on my nerves.

Oh, and John is too cute when he sits there talking to my belly and saying hello baby, this is your daddy talking and then goes on having a full blown conversation to the baby while rubbing it. haha.

17 Weeks...

Your baby is approximately 4.8 inches long and weighs about 3.5 ounces, and he or she should weigh more than the placenta from this point on. Since your baby's hearing has become more finely tuned, he or she may respond to loud noises and you may feel movement at the sound of large trucks passing or a slamming door. Epidermal (skin) and fatty tissue are developing all over your baby's body to protect it after it is born and a substance called vernix is beginning to form on the skin tissue to protect it from the long exposure to amniotic fluid.




*By week 17, your baby weighs about 4.97 ounces (140gm) and is 5.12 inches (13cm) long.
*He or she has a much more normal "human" appearance now. She holds her head more erect and her body and limbs are longer in proportion to her head.
*Pads are forming on his tiny fingertips and toes. Soon those individual swirls and whorls will be apparent.
*Her eyes are looking forward now, but they are still firmly closed.
*Meconium (composed of products of cell loss, digestive secretion and swallowed amniotic fluid), is accumulating in the bowel. This black gooey substance will become your baby's first poop!
*The umbilical cord is growing thicker and stronger and continues to rush blood and nutrients to your growing baby.
*If your child is male the prostate begins to develop.
*Her skeleton is tranforming from cartilage to bone. The bones remain flexible to make the journey through the birth canal easier.

Mommy's first maternity outfit..

Today I wore one of my new maternity outfits to work. So it was officially the first maternity outfit I've warn. haha. So I took a picture, it isn't the best picture but it will do for now. I also took a picture of the very tired soon-to-be-mommy. Oh, and my belly isn't that big yet, I bought all of my maternity clothes bigger so I can grow into them *wink*

Just Some Rambling...

Today I'm am feeling pretty good aside from the whole not sleeping thing and the fact I think I am coming down with a cold or something. I've been sniffling and sneezing like crazy for like the past two days. I feel lame that I keep complaining how tired I am but it is really starting to take its toll on me. I wish I could just have a good nights sleep. Like I said before, I get up almost every hour on the hour... everynight! It seriously sucks and I'm just exhausted. I still didn't try the taking like 50 mg of Benedryl like the doctor said I could take at night to help me. Or my friend Liz said that her doctor told her to try Tylenol PM and that it is safe during pregnancy. I haven't tried either of them yet but I think tonight I may have to give in and take something. I just need a good nights sleep. I bet this whole sleeping thing gets worse as time goes on too. Like when I start to feel the baby move and stuff. I was seriously doing pretty good for a little while there with my sleeping and only waking up a couple of times to go pee but then like Friday it all went to crap again.

This whole pregnancy thing is so crazy, sometimes it still doesn't feel real to me. I mean I know it is real and I saw the ultrasound (that was amazing and I'm happy that we got to see the lil bebe) but still, its just weird to me on some days. I'm sure once I start to feel the little munchkin move around it will be like oh my goodness, this is really real. haha. I think I'm seriously scared of feeling it move though. I might get a little freaked out or think something is happening. Yesterday I mentioned that I went shopping with Cindy (my dad's wife) for some maternity clothes and I swear last night when I was getting ready for bed my belly had grown! I swear it was alot bigger than it was in the afternoon. Or I guess maybe it could just be a psychological thing, who knows :-)

Today I was talking to some friends about the pregnancy, the baby and everything. Everyone is really so excited for us and it makes me happy. I was worried about it for a little while in the beginning. Of course we don't get invited out and stuff like we used to but I guess when people get pregnant and have babies things change more than I thought they would. I just feel like saying I'm pregnant... not dead! Argh, people get to me sometimes unless I am just getting my feelings hurt over nothing. Anyway, I was thinking about how I can't wait until March 15th to go and have our next ultrasound done. That's the one when they will hopefully be able to tell if the munchkin is a girl or a boy. I hope it isn't going to be too soon for them to tell and hopefully this time the little munchkin will be ALOT more cooperative for the camera.

First Shopping Trip for Mommy...

I'm tired and I've been sleeping terrible this week. I don't know what it is but its seriously getting on my nerves. I'm back to waking up almost every hour and then being up for a couple of hours from like 3:30-5:30am. It's really weird though because almost every morning for like two weeks now I've woken up at 3:27am. John says it will be crazy if the baby is born at 3:27 or if it wakes up for a feeding at 3:27. I said it better not be either of the two :-)

Anyway, today I met Cindy (my dad's wife) at the mall on my lunch break to look into buying some maternity clothes. She says that John's t-shirts and my hoodies just aren't doing it for me and I need to accept that I'm pregnant and buy some "cute" maternity clothes. So I finally gave in and went shopping with her. We were there for what seemed like forever! I think I tried on more clothes today that I ever have in my entire life. haha. Anyway, I got a few cute shirts and a couple of pairs of pants. The one shirt is kind of frilly for my taste but she loved it, so I just got it. I'm not sure how much I'll be wearing it though, we'll see. I guess that I'm just not a girly girl or something. So hopefully they'll last me a little while and I don't look too bad in them. I just feel fat and icky! Some of the stuff I tried on I was like oh NO, but it was good because she did the same thing. We had a good time and some good laughs. Now I just need to go and buy some new bras and new shoes and I'll be set. Or at least I think I will be for a little while.

16 Weeks...

Your baby now weighs about 2.8 ounces, and measures about 4.3 to 4.6 inches long. You may have an ultrasound scheduled soon which may tell you, if you want to know, whether it is a boy or a girl. Your baby's fingernails and toenails are now fully formed, and internally your baby's urinary tract and bladder are functioning, emptying about once every hour.







*Fat begins to form underneath skin, providing your baby with insulation for the coming months.
*Did you know that both baby and placenta are now about the same size?
*Your little one has reached 4.57 inches (11.6cm) and approximately 3.53 ounces (100gm).
*His head and neck are held straighter now.
*This is a week of "mights!" You might hear the tiny thumps of his heartbeat with an external monitor now. The genitals are developed sufficiently that an experienced sonographer might be able to determine if your baby is a boy or a girl.
*Her heart is pumping as much as 6 gallons of blood a day and beats at a rate about double your heartrate.
*If you could take a peek inside, you would witness your child's reflexes in action!(Sucking, swallowing and blinking are now evident.) She is probably even hiccuping even though you don't feel it yet!
*Your baby has learned to breathe! This is apparent from the regular movements of his chest. Isn't it amazing that he is able to breathe "underwater," inhaling and exhaling small amounts of amniotic fluid? These actions help the lungs to develop and grow.

From Daddy...

Yesterday Traci and I went to the hospital so she could get an ultrasound. It was so amazing!!! I can't tell you the way I felt when I saw that lil critter moving around on the screen. I was smiling so wide that the top of my head could have fallen off. It was just so cool to see it move. I refer to the baby as "it" because we still don't know the sex yet. We go back in four weeks to get another ultrasound so they can make sure the lil bugger is ok and then they will tell us what we are having. Traci and her sister are rooting for a girl but I just want it to be healthy. I will love whatever pops out. Today we went to the regular doctor for a quad screening. I'm not sure what that is but they took some blood from Traci and we got to hear the heart beat. The doctor said it was strong and that everything was going good. Now I have a little grainy pic to hang up at work. It isn't your regular ultrasound pic because the baby was moving around alot. Traci says it looks like a little alien pod :) So life is moving at lightning speed and just keeps getting better. Good night my little alien pod. Your daddy loves you.

Third doctors appointment...

Last night I had a horrible night sleep! I'm seriously lucky if I got two hours of sleep. At one point I got tired of sitting there and staring at the ceiling so I ended up turning on the TV. Why is it that there is NOTHING on TV late at night other than shitty infomercials??? Luckily around 4am I found a movie to watch and then watched some Alias. At one point I felt so sick I swear I thought I was going to puke my brains out. I even started sweating and everything. Needless to say today I've been pretty much worthless. I've been having brainfarts all day and will be sitting there talking to someone and just totally zone out to where I have no clue what they are talking about. I felt bad because it wasn't that I wasn't paying attention, I just don't know what happened.

Anyway, today we went to the doctors for our follow-up appointment. I think it went pretty well. The other doctor was nice and gave me a little more information than my regular doctor. She said I can try taking like 50 mg of Benedryl at night to help me sleep once in a while. I don't know if I'll do it or not but at least its an option. We talked to her about a few other things and she gave me good answers and reasons. So I was happy and I think John was too. We got to hear the heartbeat again and she took her time doing it. She said its nice and strong, so its good. I had to have a bunch of blood work done for the quad screening test thing. The stupid hospital didn't send over the test results from yesterday so I just basically had to tell her what they said. It's pretty lame because I asked them right before I left if they were sending the report over or if I had to take it because I had an appointment first thing this morning and they said no problem. Well, there was no report for her. So now she has to try to get it. She gave me the number of a surgeon to go and talk to about the lump in my belly button, so I can see if I can get it removed. So hopefully he'll do it for me. As far as I can remember that's about it. John is just as exhausted as I am today, so tonight will be a night of relaxing or at least trying to. We go back to the hospital for an ultrasound on March 15th and that's when they'll be able to tell if the lil munchkin is a girl or a boy. Then we go back to see the doctor I saw today on the 16th for another follow-up or something. haha, I forget I think pregnancy stole my brain. Unless of course the evil little alien pod growing in my belly is really a zombie and he's somehow draining it....

First Ultrasound...

We had our appointment today at the hospital to have the ultrasound done on my cervix and stuff. I was really nervous about it for some reason this morning. Not really sure why. Anyway, everything looked good with my cervix. They said that the placenta is really close to my cervix but sometimes that will happen and it will move back and fix itself as time goes on. They told us not to worry now, they will check on it again at about 28 weeks.

I also got a regular ultrasound too! I didn't even have to beg, barter, or steal to get it. haha. I saw it and was like oh wow... there really is something (a little person) growing in there and I giggled. It was amazing and seriously made me feel so much better. So we were really excited although the baby absolutely hated it!!! I said it was just a little camera shy. haha. It was jumping and twisting all over the place and doing backflips... just acting crazy. So they didn't get any really good pictures of the lil munchkin. I got two ultrasound pictures to bring home. The one you can't see much, I think it was kind of laying on its back or something. The other one it looks like an angry little alien. I think I saw the lil munchkin in the movie Independence Day. She said the baby is measuring more like 17 weeks rather than 15 weeks but it is still within the 8 days so they will keep the due date at August 4th. The heart rate was at 146 and that was also good. So today was a really good day. John and I are excited. Tomorrow we go to the doctors to have the quad screening done. I forget what that stands for and also to go over the test results with her again. Like I mentioned before we are seeing a different doctor in the practice tomorrow. So hopefully I will walk away feeling better and more comfortable about the whole thing.

Anyway, I scanned the ultrasound pictures and I'm going to try to post them. I don't want to make them too small to where you won't be able to see them so hopefully it won't mess up the layout of my blog too bad...

Busy and Stuff...

Sorry that I've been neglecting my little diary here I honestly don't mean to. Work has been busy and I'm tired. By the time I get home I seriously don't want to do anything but go to bed! It sucks, I wake up about 3:30 in the morning and I'm up for at least 2 hours before I can fall back to sleep. It has happened like 4 times this week. I don't know why, I guess maybe its the weird and bad dreams I've been having or too much on my mind. I feel like we have so much to do and I just can't seem to find the motivation to do anything. I know I have to prioritize things and just do one thing at a time but this is almost impossible for me for some reason. I just look at the whole mess of shit I need to get accomplished and get kind of discouraged? I can't do it like this, I know. Yet I continue to do it.

Last night we were out shopping for some stuff and we just took a peek in the baby section and I was melting. I wanted to buy so much stuff and so did my mom and sister. We had to stop ourselves though and walk away. Of course everything we were looking at was for girls. All I had was John's voice in the back of my head telling me NO! We don't even know if it's a girl or boy yet. My sister and I were joking and saying that's ok, we'll just dress him in drag if its a boy. haha. Today my friend Erin brought me in a little gift she bought and it is an adorable pair of little pink UGG looking boots. They are soooo adorable and so soft and fuzzy on the inside. We were laughing and saying that if the little munchkin turns out to be a boy we'll just write on the top of them I am a Boy! Poor little guy (if that's what the munchkin is). John is probably going to want to kill me. I didn't even know she got them, it was all her so he'll have to get her.

Next week we go to the doctors to have some testing done and stuff. I'm going to be seeing one of the other doctors in the practice this time, not my regular doctor. I have to see all 3 of them during the course of my pregnancy because who knows which one will be on call when I go into labor. So I'm going to talk to her and tell her about all of my concerns and worries and see if I get any better response and stuff from her or what her thoughts are. If things don't change I seriously think I'm going to have to find another doctor or something. I've been told to talk to a midwife and such but I don't know about that. It kind of scares me for some reason.

I've researched and called every place I could find about trying to get an ultrasound to ease my mind but I've lucked out time and time again. Every place I've called said I need a script from my doctor to get one, even if I want to pay for it. Well, that isn't going to happen because the doctor won't give me one. I found this place that does the 3D ultrasounds and it seems awesome. So I'm going to go there but not until like maybe 25 weeks or so. I'm telling you the doctor better give me a script to go and get one or my head is going to explode!!

15 Weeks...

Your baby weighs about 1.75 ounces and is about 4 to 4.5 inches in length. His or her heart is growing strong and, even though it is little, it is pumping between 20 and 25 quarts of blood every 24 hours. By the time you are ready to deliver, your baby's heart will be circulating up to 300 quarts of blood every 24 hours. Many fetuses develop their future hairline pattern this week, although it can take quite a bit longer for some babies' hairline or hair to fully develop.



*You may begin to feel some fluttering movements as baby kicks, flails, twists and turns (but don't panic if you don't yet). She can also grasp, squint, frown, grimace and maybe suck her thumb!
*Your baby's legs have grown longer than the arms and the body is now longer than the head.
*And you'll be happy to note that he is moving those arms and legs often!
*His skin is very thin -- so thin blood vessel are visible. It's covered by a fine, soft layer of hair called lanugo. Lanugo comes from a Latin word meaning "down." This hair is thought to help insulate your little boy.
*The three tiny bones in his middle ear have begun to harden. The auditory centers in your baby's brain haven't developed yet, so she might not really understand what you say but her hearing capacity is in the process of developing.
*Fingernails and toenails are growing.
*Eyebrows are beginning to grow and even the hair his head is sprouting. It will probably change color and texture after birth.
*All this and your little one is an amazing 3.98 inches (10.1cm) long and may weigh 2.47 ounces (70gm).

14 Weeks...

Your baby weighs almost one ounce, and is 3 to 4 inches in length. Your baby's bladder is beginning to function and, believe it or not, your baby actually begins urinating. In fact, although doctors are not really sure how or where your baby's urine is produced, they do know it is one component of the amniotic fluid, which regenerates itself every 3 to 4 hours.








*Thyroid gland has matured and your baby begins producing hormones which will be used throughout his or her life.
*In boys, the prostate gland develops
*In girls, the ovaries move from the abdomen to the pelvis
*Your little one may have learned to suck his thumb by this point!
*Your child's bones are getting harder and stronger by the day!
*Your baby's skin is very transparent still
*Lanugo (very fine hair) covers the baby's body and will continue to grow until 26 weeks gestational age - Generally this will be shed prior to birth. Its purpose is to help protect baby's skin while in all that water!
*Your baby is 3.42 inches (8.7cm) long and weighs about 1.52 ounces (43 grams) - approximately the weight of a letter!

Seriously upset with my doctor...

Ok, so after much thought about the whole ultrasound thing and being upset about them saying that I can't get one until 18-20 weeks. I decided to take John's and some others advice and call the doctor to see if I could get one anyway. I spoke to the nurse because they said the doctor wasn't available and I explained my situation to her, my thoughts, and why I would feel more comfortable having an ultrasound and me personally seeing that in fact everything is ok with the development of the baby and how its growing. I seriously think it could be considered begging! I even told them that I would pay for it if I had to. She went and got my file and came back and basically said NO! She explained to me that all of my test results came back with good numbers and everything seems ok. If the doctor had any serious concerns she would take measures to check them out. They found the heartbeat at my last appointment and it sounded good. It was seriously done in 5 seconds, how do I know. She then proceeded to tell me not to worry about it or loose any sleep over it she is sure everything is fine. She said I will get my ultrasound at about 18-20 weeks and then its great because I get to find out if it's a boy or a girl. I am seriously so pissed! Right now I am not worried about if it is a girl or a boy, I just want to see the lil munchkin, and know it is where it belongs, and everything looks good. Is that so wrong of me??? I don't think so. I got so mad and started bitching to John about it and told him I seriously think I want to change doctors at this point. He told me I'm being silly and I can't do that. If things with this doctor doesn't change quickly I am seriously going to. I don't care if I have to go find a midwife and pop the lil munchkin out at home on my bedroom floor... I will! It isn't my fault that my doctor is over crowded or whatever the problem is and can't take time to spend with their patients and insurance companies seem to suck and don't want to pay for anything!